Papa

No longer will I hear him caution me about life or just about my driving. No longer will I hear him sound asleep when I come home late. No longer will I see him drink his freshly brewed coffee with a contented face after the first sip. No longer will I see him on his couch watching TV. No longer will I hear him comment on the latest fiasco the government finds itself in. No longer will I hear him call out my name. No longer will I have this invisible net that I know will catch me when I fail. No longer can I draw strength from him when I find mine to be wanting.

All I have is this scar that refuses to go away.

What I would give to go back in time and cherish every single moment spent with him and not take him for granted. If I could just take back everything I've done or said that was hurtful to him and be the perfect son. If only I straightened out my life early so he could have seen me succeed and be truly proud of his second son. If only I could have told him more often that I love him.

The only thing I can think of doing now is treasure the fond memories I have of him...and that will have to be enough.